Day 24: My Biggest Insecurity…

I am often happy to be the butt of jokes, making most of them myself! Please feel free to poke fun at many aspects of my character or appreance, I’ve probably heard most of them before, I don’t really mind hopping aboard the banter bus and rarely take most stuff to heart. 

But there is one thing that if you take the mick out of, I will turn on you like a scorpion and probably get very upset. My biggest insecurity. 

I have a lazy eye, if you’ve met me you’re probably aware of this because it’s a very noticeable lazy eye. I have very little control over my right eye, it doesn’t do much due to how lazy it is and lacks a lot of both forward and peripheral vision. Unlike most lazy eyes (I was a 1 in 10 baby) my squint/lazy eye is vertical rather than horizontal. So when my eye goes awandering, as it does, it doesn’t turn in, it rolls up to the corner which is often very obvious. 

I hate my right eye and am SO insecure about people noticing and making comments. Photos, especially baby photos, where it is obvious are just horrible. 

My lazy eye makes it obvious when I’m not paying attention 100%, when I’m tired, when I’m feeling unwell. My lazy eye makes teaching a nightmare because if I just point at someone without saying their name, they often don’t realise I’m referring to them… Kids can be cruel with their comments, can’t they?! 

So if you ever catch me looking at you but you’re not sure, look at the left eye, that ones telling the truth! But just do me a favour, don’t make any jokes about it, yeah? 

Lex xx

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