I remember some, now pretty, infamous (well in my head anyway) advice my mum gave me once when I was about 6 or 7. The piece of advice was, don’t eat that whole bunch of grapes, you’ll get a tummy ache.
I ate all the grapes. I got a tummy ache.
I’m not sure why I didn’t take the advice at the time. Well, that’s not true, I do. I didn’t listen because I was 7 and I really like grapes. But man did I wish I’d taken that advice, would have saved me some bother!
There is plenty of advice, over my 25 years, that my parents have given me that I’ve heard, forgotten/ignored and neglected to take. And because of the amount of times I’ve had to wipe egg off my face and learn from hindsight, I like to think I’m getting better at heeding parental advice.
But recently, I’ve been learning about pieces of advice that I’ve been given and taken at the time that have proved why you maybe shouldn’t always, always take the things your ma n pa tell you at face value. For example…
- Bread and cake straight out of the oven is not indigestible and it won’t give you a tummy ache, they just don’t want you to eat it.
- There is no such thing as being “too cold to snow”, it is scientifically impossible.
- If you suck your thumb your thumb won’t shrink and you won’t need braces… My two matching thumbs and perfectly straight teeth beg to differ on that one.
- If a Father Christmas at a Christmas party where your mum works gives you an amazing present, it is not the real Father Christmas, your mum bought and wrapped that present for you. (That one still hurts)
- Having a bath is not like swimming, you don’t have to wait half an hour after eating… I can confirm you won’t get cramp in the bath (I feel a fool for believing that one until VERY recently)
Big props go to two friends for this list, Jane who believed the lies too and Catherine for telling me what’s real… She still won’t inform me where babies come from though…?
So my advice, which you can take or not, is to listen to your parentals, cos they’re generally doing it for your own good, and so what you might believe a lie for a while. In my book that makes for an interesting and humourous childhood! But there are some things you’ve just gotta believe the first time someone tells you, and seriously believe me, don’t eat all the grapes, you’ll get a tummy ache.